The following is my personal observation of my actions….my disease. I’m not speaking for all people who suffer from depression.
Here’s the thing with those of us who strive to manage life with depression. It’s tough. If we go to an off site job….meaning not at home…we will most likely brush our teeth. Some of us may take a shower, put on makeup, comb our hair. Definitely we will probably put on some street clothes or appropriate attire for our jobs.
We plaster on a semblance of a smile and do the best we can.
To. Make. It. Through. The. Day.
Is our depression buddy just around the corner? Is it just a normal “bad” day?
The more we compensate for our perceived flaws the less we feel like doing…
We slack off here, we slack of there. We stop fixing our hair and it becomes a quick brush through. Aw hell, we run our fingers through it and call it good. The makeup? It stays in the drawer. The pulled together look is replaced with whatever happens to be clean and not lying on the floor. Or maybe it is lying on the floor but it’s less wrinkled than the other clothes.
Until it affects those I love.