Fear, we all have it. I know it, but my mind takes that fear and feeds it until I have a mountain instead of a molehill. My insides churn until I’m sick to my stomach and all I seem to think about is that which makes me anxious. I can identify the source and work on this type of fear.
I’m working on my fears until I have control over my reactions to normal daily business.
However, I have times of feeling extreme anxiety and haven’t a clue where it comes from. Standing in a store and finding that I can’t see, everything seems to blur and the people around me seem like they are floating around. Heart beating so fast, palms profusely sweating, can’t breathe, oh-my-I-think-I’m-going-to-die-right-here. That kind of fear is really scary.
I have learned how to live through the attacks of pure panic. Stepping aside and letting them pass through me has helped, but usually I’m at home and can sit alone for a while. I’m determined to not let my fear overcome my life anymore. While I get a little reprieve from depression, I will work on this with great determination and the help of my medications and therapy. Maybe, one day, I will learn the source of the extreme anxiety that overcomes my mind without warning.
I made it out yesterday. All went fine. I actually had two errands to run and had to make a U-turn in order to go the right direction for one of them. I will head out today, and I have plans for next week. Instead of driving a child hauler, I have a new, fun car to drive and I feel more comfortable behind the wheel…..now I just need to quit letting the fear of the fear overtake my mind.
I’ve got this.
See what I’m doing here? I’m taking that anxiety and standing up to it. I expect to have some, just as everybody does, but I don’t have to let it control me to the point of keeping me from an active life. I can stop my mind from feeding those fears. Later, I will work on the “unknown” anxiety.
There are many ways to conquer a mountain and I shall step on those molehills. If this fraidy cat can do it, so can you.