Yesterday, He Was Seven Years Old

We have an adult/child who seems to have shut us out of his life, and I’m not sure where we went wrong or is it just a learning-to-be-adult phase.

He has always been intuitive to how I’m feeling and has always been the one who stayed behind for me. He used to be very chatty and one day he stopped chatting.

No more made-up stories, no more letting us know what his mind was churning out, nothing.

Why?

Maybe it’s because Sensible Girlfriend does all his talking? She’s “offered” her opinion about how we raised him and what we should do today. (Don’t worry, I shut that down and she’s getting better)

I miss my little Wee One in more ways than one.

 

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About April

I'll come back to this when I find out who I really am. I've been through some extremely rough patches but they have made me a better person. I blog if my brain is functioning first thing in the morning.
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25 Responses to Yesterday, He Was Seven Years Old

  1. meANXIETYme says:

    I kind of wish that WP had some other options besides “like” because this post made me kind of sad for you. 😦
    I have no children so I can’t really speak to that, except to say that I was a child once and I know I had a period where I pulled away from my mother. Obviously, that didn’t last. 🙂 I hope it’s the same for you.

    • April says:

      He’s living in our basement so he hasn’t completely moved away from us. I still get the same “what’s the plan for dinner” question, but that seems to be about it. My oldest two have been flying solo and I don’t hear from them every day, but I don’t feel as shut out as the youngest makes me feel. I’m going to have to do some ‘get in your face’ (nicely) conversations.

  2. aviets says:

    Oh, ouch. That;s a very painful stage to be going through. I hope he moves on from it very soon. Thinking of you…

  3. joey says:

    I can relate.
    Sissy’s (insert all the swear words) significant other is like the door people have to knock on to get to Sissy.
    disgruntled for years now

  4. Life is interesting thing, it teaches us many new things daily,
    but for some reason we keep ignoring, and stepping in same s….t again and again If you care for advice from a personal experience (FYI; my kid is 26 and married now)
    Do not get disappointed but keep giving unlimited amount of love
    this is just a stage, but you are going to be his mother forever
    Sooner or later he will come to his senses and realize that you are the only person on this planet
    that will love him unconditionally and forever

    PS: Be careful not to seem too needy, because it is turn off, be happy for him and supportive
    do not volunteer any advices unless asked for, just be the best friend a man can ask for
    I hope my 2 cents will help,

    Love, Health, and Wealth,
    Alex Moses
    Awakened Business Coach
    https://alifeanswer.com/

    • April says:

      Thanks! I looked back at some of my old blog posts and I was having the same problem with my oldest son. He got through the phase and we have a wonderful relationship with him now! I just need to wait this out and let him come to us when he’s ready.

  5. Sometimes you just get quiet. Sometimes you count on the people you love the most to understand that you need to go off exploring and that they will wait for you. Sometimes you just take family for granted and focus on yourself. It could be a number of things but you won’t know until you ask.

    • April says:

      Conversations with him are like the 20-question routine. I had to stop doing that. We did talk and he told me he was just quiet. The answer is fine with me. I won’t be pushing anymore.

  6. mewhoami says:

    Hopefully this will only be temporary and he will come back around before too long. Maybe he’s just going through some things of his own and in time he’ll overcome.

    • April says:

      Yes, I remember having the same issue with my oldest son. I think we get used to them being certain ways and they keep growing. I have to learn to let them grow and understand that as adults they will keep changing.

  7. 😦 Parenting is NOT easier just because they get older.

  8. Aww that’s no fun. Hugs. ❤
    Diana xo

  9. Glynis Jolly says:

    He sounds a bit like my brother. If so, he’s changed gears. Whether it’s temporary or not, I couldn’t even begin to guess. Does the woman in his life have anything to do with it? I’d say most definitely, but he might have changed anyway. Will he reverse at some point. I would gander he won’t but if he does, it won’t be a 180 degree deal. I accept my brother as he is. He’s always been his own person, whatever that may be. I have a great respect for him and what he tries to do with his life and what he tries to do for others.

    • April says:

      Yes, I think he is just growing. My oldest did the same and I had to take a gander at some old blog posts to remind myself. He’s my youngest and I guess I’m half expecting him to stay that young chatty kid and half expecting him to grow up. This just may be who he chooses to be as a grownup.

  10. reocochran says:

    Your “sensible girlfriend” and you occasionally gets along with you and I remember some Sunday inclusions of her in your happy weeklong memories. I have not noticed your son not being responsive nor left out of smiles Sundays.
    This makes me sad, due to knowing and understanding your emotional reactions, along with your fears set off due to early diagnosis of cancer.
    Cycles are usually connected with women (and girls) but they can also occur with young and adult men. My son was in an emotional mess when he lost a job. Took it out in DIL and me, due to our being willing to listen but it was hard to handle his “dark” moods. By “being there,” though he is more open and loving now. Crossing my fingers for this to resolve soon, April. ❤

  11. reocochran says:

    Your son’s “sensible girlfriend” . . .
    (I am correcting my beginning sentence, April 🙂 )

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