I’m not sure if I will reach a person who lives with a person who suffers from a mental illness diagnosis. Maybe you’re a friend, or a co-worker who doesn’t recognize certain aspects of the disease.
I share posts with my husband. I think it helps him to understand the thoughts which appear irrational—but are completely real to our minds.
I’m really only speaking for myself because I don’t know if this is true for all suffering from a mental illness.
I push people away. I’m irritable, I sound extremely bitchy, it looks, or sounds like I’m being dismissive. I may be totally silent, and answer questions with one word.
Because I do this, I feel bad about myself. I’m ashamed of my actions, and all I want to do is to run from any interaction with a human. Even my beloved cats become annoying to me.
Yes, I want space, but it isn’t a conscious desire to withdraw—it’s part of the nature of the beast.
Please, don’t turn your back.
Don’t shut off communication.
Words aren’t always necessary, but a touch on the shoulder, a hug, or a smile could make a world of difference at that particular moment.
Also, I don’t know if I will ever get better, but I know I’m strong and I will learn to work around my diagnosis. Maybe I will eventually learn to control that part of me which creates more self-hate. It isn’t directed toward you—it’s me I’m fighting with.