Facing That Part of Yourself You Don’t Like

Please—to any of you who suffer from depression, anxiety, OCD, or any other mental illness—I am learning to laugh at myself. This is my recovery process, and it’s what’s working for me. I mean no disrespect to any reader who may believe I am dismissing mental illness. I’ve lived thorough it, and I’m on the other side trying to improve myself and enjoy my life. I don’t want to go back to being stuck in the muck.

I began this post days ago, in my typical whiny way of writing.

Thinking about what I wanted to say, I burst out laughing, and decided to go another direction.

I’m sure y’all have heard the quote by Albert Einstein;

Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.

The study of psychology, the human mind, human behavior, or any professional studies pertaining to why humans do what they do, is not in my portfolio.

My portfolio includes a bunch of doing the same things over and over, expecting different results.

I’m insane!

Well–maybe it sounds better if I say that I do insane things, which doesn’t necessarily make me insane.

I seriously wish that computers, the “paperless life”, or “going green”, was part of my early adulthood. Apparently, I must have something to touch in order for it to be real.

When we moved from the Seattle area to the Atlanta area, I had a ton of paperwork. I have admitted I’m a paper hoarder.

When we moved, I wasn’t about to move my hoard across the country, because that was silly. So I dug out my hoard, dating back to 1979. I kid you not. I shredded and purged.

We moved in 2006.

Giving myself a break, because of the life changes I have survivedย since 2006, I still had the problem of letting go of papers. My therapist suggested that I hire a professional organizer.

Pfft. I have a brain, and I know how to use it.

The other day, as I was going through each piece of paper, I discovered another little Ugly in myself. I began to mentally boo-hoo about the scope of the tasks I have ahead of me. I heard the words of my therapist as I held a little receipt—“What purpose does this serve?”

In 2014, who holds a receipt from the Dollar Store dated 2006?


That little Ugly has to go, and I’m laughing as I kick its butt to the curb ๐Ÿ˜€



About April

I'll come back to this when I find out who I really am. I've been through some extremely rough patches but they have made me a better person. I blog if my brain is functioning first thing in the morning.
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11 Responses to Facing That Part of Yourself You Don’t Like

  1. aviets says:

    Oh, my goodness, we live that reality in our house, too. I delight in throwing away almost everything, and my husband is the one who hangs onto receipts and paperwork from the dark ages. It causes a lot of strife, I can tell you! I admire you for working to clear it all out! -Amy

    • April says:

      Hahaha! I had to buy two huge under-the-bed sweater containers. I’m using them as new litter pans for the bad cat who is not wanting to use his. I read that big cats may not like the little pans, so….

      Anyway, they came with two lids. I looked at them and said…I wonder what I could use these for? My husband replied that I could recycle them (garbage). He kept on by saying…you can do it, you know you can. ugh

  2. KICK IT TWICE APRIL! ๐Ÿ™‚ Good for you for laughing and moving forward. ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. suzjones says:

    You go girl. I have to go through my filing tray and cabinet and purge once again. That’s a job for next week I think. ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Gallivanta says:

    Admiring your butt kicking.

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